Recovering from a Miscarriage
by jmmillerGoing through a miscarriage should be treated the same as any other tragic loss; unfortunately, many women are unsure how they should deal with a miscarriage. They may feel that no one understands what they are going through, or that they have done something that caused the miscarriage.
In truth, most early miscarriages happen because of a problem or deformity in the fetus or placenta. Most women will experience a miscarriage at some point in their fertile lives, often without realizing it. Sometimes the fertilized egg doesn’t attach to the uterine wall properly, resulting in a late period that may be especially heavy. Other times miscarriages occur several weeks or months into the pregnancy, and these are especially painful (emotionally and sometimes physically).
Miscarriages after the first trimester are less common, and are often due to a physiological problem with the mother, such as an incompetent cervix (which dilates early and is unable to hold the pregnancy) or low-lying placenta. Miscarriages between 12 and 20 weeks are called ‘late miscarriages’, while deliveries over 20 weeks are considered premature births, as the baby has a chance of survival.
Mothers-to-be sometimes choose not to tell people the news of their pregnancy ‘just in case’; however, this is really a matter of preference. If you do suffer a miscarriage, your family and friends will certainly understand and respect your loss.
It is important to recognize the warning signs of a possible miscarriage and to report these symptoms to your doctor or emergency room immediately.
- Heavy cramping in your abdomen or lower back
- Spotting or bleeding
- A feeling of ‘bearing down’ or the need to push
- Sharp pains or a dull ache in the abdomen or back
If a miscarriage is threatening, your doctor may prescribe bedrest or other measures to try to avoid it. If a miscarriage does occur, you may be given a D&C to remove the contents of your uterus, preventing infection.
This can be a very painful process, physically and emotionally, and should be treated as the significant loss that it is. Give yourself time to recover, and ask your doctor to recommend a therapist or counsellor to help you through the grieving process. Understand that there is probably nothing you could have done differently that would have affected the outcome.
Women who have suffered three miscarriages should speak to their doctor about looking into a possible cause. Often, the cause is never discovered and they go on to have successful pregnancies. Other times, there is a minor problem that can be corrected or treated. If you have had a recent miscarriage, it can be very tempting to try to conceive again immediately, especially if you had been trying for some time. However, it is best to allow your body time to heal, in order to give your next pregnancy the best chance possible. Each pregnancy, successful or not, takes a toll on your body and especially your uterus. Take time for yourself, and your partner, to grieve your loss.
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